PERSONAL, PHOTOGRAPHERS

Video-making, Fear, and Hitting Submit

04.02.2012

Avoidance. Procrastination. Distraction.

I let these three things rule my mind for the last couple of weeks. When Creative Live announced that Jasmine Star would be returning to Seattle for a third course on the Making and Marketing of an Editorial Wedding, I was excited. I’m a huge fan of Creative Live courses and I love that they make education for creatives accessible and affordable. Then Jasmine made the announcement that she was looking for live audience members.

Getting Published. Shooting an Editorial Wedding. Creative Live Jasmine Star

Part of me wanted to make a video. Another part of me said, “You’ll never get chosen, so why bother trying.” So even though the announcement came out weeks ago and I’ve had time I avoided it, procrastinated, and distracted myself.

But why was I doing it? Why was I preventing myself from moving my business forward?

Because I was scared. Fear was getting the best of me.¬†Part of me was terrified of making a video. Not because I’m scared of being in front of the camera, but because it would mean that I’d have to watch it later. I was afraid that I’d embarrass myself. I was afraid of what others would think (and even though I keep telling myself that I don’t care what others think, I do…working on this!).

However, I’ve learned over the last few days (and my own crash course in filmmaking) that the best way to get over your own fears and insecurities is to suck it up and do it anyway. Plus, when you’re recording your own video…the outtakes are hilarious. And the embarrassment subsides rather quickly.

I almost didn’t tell Cent I was going to apply.

I almost didn’t even show him my video.

I almost didn’t send in my submission.

I wasn’t going to blog my video.

But I’m feeling the fear, and doing it anyway. And sharing it here.

Today is the last day to submit a video!

Of course I waited until the last minute.

I would love a seat for this edition of Creative Live! I would love to learn all I can about the making and marketing of an editorial wedding and hang out with Jasmine, JD, the Creative Live crew, and the other lucky audience members. But if anything, I’m just thrilled that I faced my fears square in the eyes and pushed myself forward. Even if I don’t get chosen, I will have at least tried. I know that big risks lead to big changes, and for me this felt like a huge risk…of putting myself out there, on the internet, facial expressions, nervousness, and all.

And now that I’ve done one video…I may do another.

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7 Comments

  • Reply Mary Marantz 04.02.2012 at 9:52 am

    LOVE you! I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you!

    xoxo
    M:)

  • Reply Lydia 04.02.2012 at 10:39 am

    Way to go, Catie! Hope you get a seat!!

    By the way, whenever I click the “opt out of ‘thank you’ emails” link, it just takes me to the blog homepage and still sends a thank you email.

  • Reply Emily Hudspeth 04.02.2012 at 3:42 pm

    I love it, Catie! You conquer those fears girl. I know it is hard and yes watching it submitting takes everything you’ve got. I am so proud of you! PS, you look beautiful! Your hair is so long!

  • Reply Emily Hudspeth 04.02.2012 at 3:43 pm

    Thank you for the reminder that big risks lead to big changes! I love that!

  • Reply Kathleen Burkhalter 04.02.2012 at 4:59 pm

    You are great!

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